i love the kind of midnight ride when everything and everywhere is still a patch of black and the only thing alive is our perpetual laughter in the car. we could merely contain our excitement in the dark and the anticipation that we longed to feel grows a little with every traveled miles. for a moment, this surreal reality freed us from our heavy life burdens.

i guess it's always the smallest, insignificant gestures, actions, moments and things that doesn't seem to matter mattered most. my body now has a few new scars from the snorkeling trip, and as much as i hated scars, i particularly love these new ones because they carry stories and meanings. when i look at these scars scattered around my knee, ankle, elbow and palm, i realized what i fear the most is not having a few new scars but the lack of courage to try new things.

i'll never forget our drunken night, a night so wild and free i feel a little shocked and privileged to experience. i like how alcohol can get me to a state of becoming the person i'd always wanted – but too afraid – to be. being intoxicated is such a guilty pleasure, which is why i love it – amazing yet so destructive. that particular night gets a little too personal when we started spinning the empty beer bottle. there are a lot of screaming, truth talks, bathroom trips, throw ups and hilarious behaviors. it's the kind of night that knows no boundaries and i'm missing it secretly.

one of those night, i fell in love with an 'acquaintance' after our drinking session in the chalet room. he laid his head on a pillow and fell asleep on my crossed lap while we were having a hyped up group chat on the bed. i enjoyed these insignificant yet affectionate gestures and allowed myself to sink into crazy fantasies. maybe it's the alcohol, maybe it's my heart, or both, i can't tell but i'm conscious about my feeling – insane, delicate and thrilled.

i think the fun part about traveling is certainly not just about the destination, your partners and companions mattered. i believe travel experiences are part of growth and i'm grateful to be able to learn and grow with people i cherish, people i never wanted to say goodbye to.

to all my dear solanhais, thank you for coming into my life and giving me these unforgettable memories.

Labels: Travel