" Did you regret going after me? it's okay you can be completely honest i promise no hard feelings "
" Nope, never before, with full honesty "

Sometimes i wonder do i deserve this answer, even after what i've done?

 As much as i hate to admit it, i'm selfish, just because i wanted us to be friend again i work hard for our friendship without considering how he would feel about it. getting an answer like that seems to have given me more hopes than i thought i originally had but it's just not too right to work it out after an awkward situation. the timing just isn't right but i'm so afraid that we'll eventually fall back into the 'stranger' stage if i don't do something about it so i stupidly came up with this idea. well i think i've probably gone too far.

Anyway, i did it again. Yes that selfish bitch thingy. The only thing i could thought about at that point of time is to approach him in a relaxed, casual and non-confrontational manner so we could both work it out. Not sure if it's gonna fix our friendship or make it worst but i decided to go all out and be honest to him. So we started out as a very simple conversation then it gets more and more sensitive and trust me, it's the best part 'cause we both confessed to each other (which is a good thing cause its an act of honesty and honesty's one of the factor to ensure a long lasting friendship/relationship). Well i thought everything is finally good between us since we're both so open 'bout it but man this is just so wrong 'cause at the end of the day, everything remain the same. We're still awkward, and we don't make much conversations like we used to. it's driving me crazy i'm so confused!

 K

on a complete unrelated note, i think a person's taste change from time to time. i used to loathe black so much till the extent of throwing/giving away all the black stuff i owned and never buy any until recently. i noticed i'm not that into casual chic anymore. Unbelievable but true, i'm more into edgy style now. Guess i picked up the new obsession from taylor momsen after one too many episodes of gossip girls. It's crazily addictive and the fashion are killers!